Before age 24

Hey.

It's probably for the best. You were never going to like me.

I used to think that if only you met the real me, you would have liked me. I seriously believed that for quite a while. It would have been really sweet if we got together eventually because that would have been the result of an amazing combination of faith and chance. However, I don't believe in fairy tales anymore.

Although we are on good friendly terms today, deep down I know that we would never be together. There's no such thing as the 'real' me. He doesn't exist because I already am that person. I can never be the ideal 'real' version of myself that you would find attractive when I am in front of you. At age 24, it is really about time I embrace reality. I can't close my eyes and pretend I still have a chance anymore.

I've stripped away too much distraction in my life to know that eventually I must handle the truth about you one day.

I don't regret the letters I sent to you. I don't regret the affection I had for you. These were important phases of growth to the person that I was and the memories will always be there.

I still want to see you, but I don't know what else to talk about but this.

I want to know what you think of me before I close this chapter.